on the eve...

Wow. Or maybe, "whoa." Or "whew." But "wow" works.

What a strange long path it has been to here. I guess i've been tacking toward this evening since my childhood. Before i married i asked her if she could live on a boat. I didn't want to let go of this dream. But the truth is, even tho she said yes, and even tho we didn't get here, i was in love with her no matter what she would have answered. And marrying her was the better dream by far. Now that she's gone...this is my version of "going on." How many of us are on a path that, to someone who doesn't know us, looks on surface to be "just" another path? When in fact our story makes it so much more than that...to us. Makes it profound. So this is big for me.

But enuf of that. Lighten up. I am about to begin an adventure. Oh boy! Which means that i don't know what it is i will see when i look back on this someday. And the only way to find that out is to begin.

It's getting late tho. The wind is howling tonight. Akimbo rocks gently in her slip. Full of fuel, water, food. Prepared as much as i could prepare her, the lists of tasks to get ready are done now. And re-done. I meant to write sooner, but getting ready has been a lot of work, harried, two steps forward and one step back... I've addressed so many details before heading out, only to test them and find i have to address them again. I'm impressed by what a dynamic balance a boat's systems are. We could go out and watch all my prep payoff smoothly...or come unraveled, either way. I've done all i can to get the boat and myself shaped up for this, but there will always be a list. There are things i didn't get to, but if i waitied until i got to it all...i would never leave. True.

My emotions have run their roller coaster ride only to arrive at surrender. Which seems appropriate. Don't we ultimately end up surrendering? So, here we go. The weather window is looking good for now, cross our fingers. Wish us luck. I'll hope to write again soon. Thank you all for your interest, and so many dear ones for your support on many levels, for our heartfelt goodbyes, a wonderful sendoff. Now to expand our definition of "neighborhood." My fondest hope, wildest desire, etc...would be that this adventure, this blog, this boat and myself become a source for you.

Now, i've got to get to sleep. G'night.